September 2011
4 posts
1 tag
2 tags
3 tags
August 2011
10 posts
3 tags
12 tags
1 tag
1 tag
“Mustang Sally was playing at the Beer Barrel. I brought the party purse and we...”
– My mom is cooler than me.
July 2011
7 posts
1 tag
1 tag
1 tag
June 2011
7 posts
2 tags
3 tags
May 2011
3 posts
oh hey tumblr. I’ve been gone for awhile. I’m back but only sorta? Video comin soon. Missssssedddddd uuuuuuuuu.
April 2011
7 posts
1 tag
Innocuous Slogans That Would Sound Scary If...
boobsradley:
In here, it’s always Friday.
Think outside the bun.
If you don’t have an iPhone, well, you don’t have an iPhone.
What’s in your Wallet?
Get the door, it’s Domino’s!
still emo after all these years
me: i didn't sleep at all last night
AND
I totally had a dream about him! ugh
Travis: sex dream?
me: no
even worse
a cuddle dream
lowbrow + brilliant: You Know What's Awesome? Band... →
doaskid:
nonobjectiveportraitofkarma:
aaapocalypso:
mermaidmilk:
thereforeshesthewitch:
eatenplacenta:
In the spirit of today’s Bikini Kill nostalgia, I remembered the awesome lyric diss war between Kathleen Hanna and Fat Mike, the lead singer from that shitty pop punk band NOFX.
So basically, Kathleen Hanna at some point at some point called NoFX misogynists, and Fat Mike...
March 2011
9 posts
If Ernest Hemingway Had Written Yelp Reviews →
christmasgorilla:
Pinkberry Category: Ice Cream and Frozen Yogurt ONE STAR
I met a woman who said she had been to Pinkberry. “What the hell is that,” I said, and she laughed but said nothing.
Sun City Asian Bistro and Café Category: Asian TWO STARS
I called Sam and asked him if he wanted to come to dinner…
Newsweek: Wow. In Which Marie Claire Breaks Down... →
equalitymyth:
And for today’s morning injustice:
LATE NIGHT, BY THE NUMBERS:
The Tonight Show With Jay Leno Male writers: 19 Female writers: 1
Conan Male writers: 17 Female writers: 1
The Colbert Report Male writers: 16 Female writers: 1
The Late Show With David Letterman Male writers: 13 Female writers: 1
Lopez…
The best journalism-job want ad ever ever. →
motherjones:
You should, like, strongly consider applying to work for this guy:
We want to add some talent to the Sarasota Herald-Tribune investigative team. Every serious candidate should have a proven track record of conceiving, reporting and writing stellar investigative pieces that provoke change….
2 tags
Beck - Hollywood Freaks
Dudes I forgot how...
1 tag
alternate realities
me: its funny to imagine my life if i had never encountered a drop of alcohol
like
i'd probably look 10 years younger
have a rocking body
career dreams achieved
BOUGHT A HOUSE PROBS
with all the money i saved
Travis: honestly tho, i think that people who are really successful at stuff don't really drink
me: ugh but they probably suck
like, every day they wake up thinking "i feel like i've missed something really important." and there is a voice whispering "FUUUUUUN. YOURE MISSING FUUUUUN."
Travis: LOL
no, they probably wake up and say, "look how beautiful and successful i am... i'm gonna go to the gym!"
me: SHHHHHHHHHHH
February 2011
19 posts
1 tag
